Mothers, Fathers, and Sons

Images courtesy: Sisson family

Kevin Sisson will never forget the day he challenged his son, future U.S. Army 2nd Lt. Justin Sisson, on a baseball field in Overland Park, Kan.

"I met him as he was coming back to the dugout," said Kevin, who was coaching his teenage son's team, which was behind in the game. "I said, 'You need to step up ... the team needs you to lead.'"

The next time Justin came to bat, he hit a home run. Then, with the game on the line, Justin did it again.

"It was his second home run," Kevin proudly recalled. "And it was Father's Day."

Justin had never hit a ball out of the park before the memorable Father's Day gift, and he never did so again. But the moment reminded his parents that whenever their son was challenged, he would respond.

"He always fought back," Kevin said. "He was never down and out."

Justin strived to follow in his grandfather's footsteps by attending West Point. But when he initially failed to gain a coveted spot at the U.S. Military Academy, Justin refused to give up his dream of becoming an Army officer.

"He went to (Florida State University) with an ROTC scholarship," Justin's mom, Phyllis Sisson, said. "He wound up joining the National Guard."

During his sophomore year, Justin volunteered for a deployment to Iraq with his National Guard unit.

"As a college student, he did not have to deploy," Justin's dad said. "He did not have to go."

"He felt like it was going to make him a better officer," his mom added. "He got his first Bronze Star as a Specialist."

Sure enough, when Justin came home, a letter inviting him to attend West Point — the second since his initial rejection — was waiting.

"Justin once again said no," Phyllis said.

After the Iraq war veteran graduated from Florida State, 2nd Lt. Justin Sisson was commissioned as an officer and soon became a Ranger with the 101st Airborne Division, which he was eager to join on an upcoming Afghanistan deployment.

"This is what he wanted to do," the soldier's mother said.

"He wasn't going to do it any other way," his father added.

In May 2013, with Justin leading his platoon near Afghanistan's border with Pakistan, Kevin and Phyllis knew their son faced grave danger.

"Justin had told us before he deployed that the Taliban and al-Qaida were coming back over the mountains," his mom said.

But when both parents connected with Justin for a rare Skype call on his remote base, they saw a 23-year-old man making a difference.

"He looked really good," Phyllis said.

"He was happy," Kevin agreed.

On June 3, 2013, the Sissons learned that their son had been killed — along with Spc. Robert Pierce, 20 — by a suicide vehicle-borne improvised explosive device. Justin's parents said that the attack also killed an Afghan police officer and 10 schoolchildren.

"He was fighting the whole way," Phyllis said of Justin, who eventually succumbed from blood loss after suffering a devastating shrapnel wound.

Justin's parents, who now live in Phoenix, are thankful to the Army, the Patriot Guard Riders and communities across the country for coming together to honor their son, who was buried at Leavenworth National Cemetery in Kansas.

"When we got to Leavenworth, all these kids and families were holding signs and posters," Kevin said. "It was just tremendous."

When Justin's personal effects were sent home from Afghanistan, one item may have meant the most of all.

"Justin had told me that he had a Mother's Day gift for me," Phyllis said.

Sure enough, a jewelry box wrapped in bubble paper found its way to Justin's mom. A fellow soldier was with Justin in an Afghan village when he bought it.

"That would be perfect for my mom," the soldier quoted Justin as saying.

Less than a year after 2nd Lt. Justin Sisson's death, Kevin and Phyllis have endowed an ROTC scholarship fund in his memory at Florida State. They miss their son, and they will always treasure his Mother's and Father's Day gifts.

"Our greatest fear is that we're going to forget something," the father said.

"So we're doing whatever we can to keep his memory alive," the mother added.

COPYRIGHT 2014 CREATORS.COM

Tom Sileo is a nationally syndicated columnist and co-author of BROTHERS FOREVER: The Enduring Bond Between a Marine and a Navy SEAL that Transcended Their Ultimate Sacrifice. Written with Col. Tom Manion (Ret.) and published by Da Capo Press, BROTHERS FOREVER will be released in May. To find out more about Tom Sileo, or to read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators website.

Remember the 'Unselfie'

Image courtesy: Cpl. Dustin March

Before leaving for his fifth deployment to Iraq, Master Sgt. Robert Horrigan, who had been planning to retire from the U.S. Army, told his commanding officer that "if you're going, I'm going with you."

Master Sgt. Horrigan, 40, wound up making the ultimate sacrifice during that deployment.

After Staff Sgt. Travis Mills lost his arms and legs in Afghanistan, he lay in his hospital bed worrying about his fellow soldiers still in harm's way. Every day, he would have his wife send messages to his Army brothers to make sure they were safe.

Staff Sgt. Mills, now 27, has since become a nationally recognizable face of America's wounded warriors.

When 1st Lt. Travis Manion was asked why he had to return a second time to the hellish streets of Fallujah, Iraq, he told his brother-in-law that if he didn't go, a Marine with less experience would be sent in his place.

"If not me, then who... " 1st Lt. Manion, 26, said five months before he was killed in action.

Our nation is consumed with the selfie, which dominates social media and has been embraced by many media figures, celebrities and even some prominent politicians. While there is nothing wrong with posting fun pictures, the selfie fad underscores an increase tendency to celebrate ourselves.

In this column space, you read about heroes like Horrigan, Mills and Manion, who placed service above self while asking for nothing in return. These brave men and women do not seek the spotlight, and in many cases, are uncomfortable if the spotlight finds them.

While many television stations, newspapers and websites focus on the selfie, this column is a place to read about the "unselfie" — an act of unselfishness. In my mind, these are the moments that should also saturate social media, especially when it comes to the Facebook, Twitter and Instagram accounts of national leaders.

Master Sgt. Jennifer Loredo was serving in Afghanistan when her husband, Staff Sgt. Eddie Loredo, 34, was killed in a different part of the country. When I spoke with Master Sgt. Loredo, the 37-year-old soldier was leading the Army's Master Resilience Training program to help other military families cope with tragedy.

Nobody would have looked down on Jennifer if she left the military to grieve her husband and focus solely on caring for their children. Instead, she put others above herself.

"I wanted to make (Eddie) proud and my kids proud, too," she said.

First Lt. Tom Martin's first application to the U.S. Military Academy at West Point was rejected. He joined the Army anyway and eventually gained acceptance to the storied institution.

"He had a true conviction for what was right," his mother, Candy Martin, said.

The respected Army officer could have done anything he wanted with his life before he was killed in action at age 27. Instead of believing that responding to 9/11 was someone else's job, 1st Lt. Martin took it upon himself to protect America.

"I gotta go rid the world of evil," he often said.

Sgt. Devin Snyder was a popular, athletic high school track star who loved the color pink. But when high school was over, she enlisted in the Army.

"She was very strong-willed," Sgt. Snyder's father, Ed, told me. "She knew what she wanted."

Devin was devastated when she saw fellow soldiers injured in an enemy roadside bomb attack in Afghanistan. But while agonizing for her wounded friends, she enthusiastically suited up for another mission, during which she was killed at age 20.

After Devin made the ultimate sacrifice, friends painted an American flag with her smiling face on a rock in Upstate New York. Soon after a local fraternity was criticized for painting over the memorial, it issued a statement.

"In a brief moment of self-gratification, we thought of no one else but ourselves, and for that we were wrong," the statement, printed by Time Warner Cable News Rochester, read in part.

The fraternity's epiphany is instructive, because the frequency of Americans placing self above all else is too often. Whenever I'm guilty of becoming consumed with my own interests, my weekly conversations with these heroes and their families serve as dramatic wake-up calls.

The selfie is fun. The "unselfie" is what truly matters.

COPYRIGHT 2014 CREATORS.COM

Tom Sileo is a nationally syndicated columnist and co-author of BROTHERS FOREVER: The Enduring Bond Between a Marine and a Navy SEAL that Transcended Their Ultimate Sacrifice. Written with Col. Tom Manion (Ret.) and published by Da Capo Press, BROTHERS FOREVER will be released in May. To find out more about Tom Sileo, or to read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators website.

The Front Porch

Images courtesy: Ristau family

We all have a favorite place. U.S. Army Sgt. Michael Ristau's was the front porch.

"When he was in Iraq and Afghanistan — when we would ask him what he needs — the very last thing he would always say is 'don't forget to pack the front porch,'" said Sgt. Ristau's mother, Susie Ristau.

For Michael, the front porch of his parents' Cascade, Iowa, home — which they bought shortly after he joined the military in 2004 — was a place of peace. It was of stark contrast to the battlefields the young soldier had experienced since 9/11, as well as a major health scare.

Long before Michael joined the military, he was the neighborhood prankster growing up in Rockford, Ill.

"He was a fun kid ... he was a jokester," Susie said. "Whenever he walked into a room, it could be 'blah' but he would have everyone laughing within five minutes."

After getting into trouble during high school, Michael went to a military academy, where he gained both discipline and a diploma. He also made a decision about what would come next: enlisting in the Army.

"I said 'no ... I don't want you to go,'" Susie recounted. "Then my husband sat him down and said 'Michael, this is not fun and games ... we are at war.'"

Undeterred by the conflict in Afghanistan and increasing bloodshed in Iraq, Michael, then 17, convinced his parents to sign release papers.

"Mom, I have to do this," Susie quoted her son as saying. "I have to go fight for our country."

From that moment on, Michael received his parents' unflinching support.

Roughly three years after finishing basic training and being stationed at Washington's Fort Lewis, Michael called his parents from Iraq with shocking news.

"While he was there they discovered a lump in his throat, took him to Germany for a biopsy and found out that he had cancer," Susie said.

For the young soldier, the most frustrating part of the disease wasn't the diagnosis itself. It was leaving Iraq early and missing the chance to deploy a second time with his brothers and sisters in arms.

"He felt he needed to be there," the soldier's mom said. "That was pretty hard on him."

By May 2011, Michael was cancer-free and cleared for a deployment to Afghanistan. He left that December, just 19 days after the soldier and his wife, Elizabeth, welcomed their first child.

In May 2012, Michael re-enlisted. His mom — already on pins and needles while her son served in a war zone — was upset, but eventually came to understand Michael's decision.

"He felt that the Army was where he needed to be," she said.

On July 13, 2012, Susie was alone in her house when she saw a strange brown truck sitting outside. Next was a series of knocks that got progressively louder.

"As I opened the screen door, I saw the chaplain and other (soldiers) walking to the side of the house," said Susie, her voice cracking with emotion. "I just dropped to the floor, because I knew."

After her husband, Randy, rushed home from work, the soldiers told both stunned parents that Sgt. Michael Ristau, 25, had been killed earlier that day in Afghanistan when enemy forces attacked his vehicle with an improvised explosive device.

For Susie, nothing was worse than sharing the dreadful news with Michael's siblings.

"It was horrible," she said.

Over 1,000 people and 2,000 American flags filled the small Iowa community to salute the fallen soldier and his family. But for Susie, the hardest part came when the ceremonies ended.

"It's still day-by-day," Susie said 20 months after Michael's death. "I was in a very bad depression stage until about three weeks ago."

If there is one calming place, it is the front porch that gave Sgt. Michael Ristau a respite from the horrors of war.

"That summer in 2012 ... I lived on that front porch," the Gold Star mom said. "That was the place where I found the most comfort."

As the Midwest warms up from a hard winter, Susie Ristau plans to sit in her favorite place and remember the 25 years she had with her son.

"He's with me all the time," she said.

COPYRIGHT 2014 CREATORS.COM

Tom Sileo is a nationally syndicated columnist and co-author of BROTHERS FOREVER: The Enduring Bond Between a Marine and a Navy SEAL that Transcended Their Ultimate Sacrifice. Written with Col. Tom Manion (Ret.) and published by Da Capo Press, BROTHERS FOREVER will be released in May. To find out more about Tom Sileo, or to read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators website.

Bigger Than Life

Images courtesy: John Horrigan

As twin brothers, Robert and John Horrigan did everything together. Whether it was hunting and fishing as boys or joining the U.S. Army as adults, their bond was one that could never be broken.

"The closest person to me on the face of the earth was my twin brother," John, 49, said.

From an early age, Master Sgt. Robert Horrigan displayed qualities that would lead to him becoming one of America's most respected battlefield warriors.

"He would give you the shirt off his back," the soldier's twin said. "Robert would do anything for anybody ... if he had a dollar in his pocket and you needed it, he'd give it to you."

Dollars were sometimes hard to come by as the Horrigan family endured financial struggles during parts of Robert and John's boyhood.

"You earn what you've got, and my father, my mom ... all of us were like that," John said. "It takes hard work and dedication to get where you are, and Robert was the same way."

In 1984, the Horrigan twins joined the U.S. Army. The brothers would eventually end up in the same Ranger platoon, where they served under Gen. Stanley McChrystal, the future commander of all U.S. forces in Afghanistan.

"It was phenomenal being in the Army together with my brother," John said.

Even though John had long since retired from military service by Sept. 11, 2001, he could see the impact the terrorist attacks had on his brother, who had earned a coveted spot on the Army's elite Delta Force.

"I know it affected him a lot, especially with the unit he was with," the soldier's brother said. "He went down and got the U.S. flag tattooed on his left (pectoral muscle)."

By December 2001, Robert was hunting Osama bin Laden in what would become one of the most important chapters of the entire U.S.-led war on terrorism.

"Robert was in Tora Bora," John said. "Robert told me he was running through a field not far from (Taliban leader) Mullah Omar's house."

In the years to come, Robert was part of many historic battles. His astounding bravery and heroism has been chronicled in several books, and quickly became legendary in military circles.

"Robert saw Gen. McChrystal about 15 years after we were in Ranger battalion, and Stanley remembered," John recalled. "For someone to remember your name 15 years later is pretty incredible."

Still, the burdens placed on Robert's shoulders were almost superhuman in nature.

"Robert went to Afghanistan three times and went to Iraq five times," his twin said.

Having served in the military himself, John knew that his brother was frequently in life or death situations. He remembers one particular conversation they had about preparing for the worst.

"If I get killed, you're just going to have to get over it," Robert told his twin.

"It's easier said than done," John replied.

By 2005, John was a firefighter in Austin, Texas, while Robert, who was married with one daughter, was starting to look beyond his 19-year military career.

"He wanted to get out and he wanted to make knives," John said. "He enjoyed the craft of it."

Before he retired from the Army, Robert volunteered for one last deployment with his Delta Force brothers.

"If you're going, I'm going with you," the master sergeant told his commanding officer.

As Robert fought insurgents in Iraq and John fought fires in Austin, the Horrigan twins kept in close touch via email. But one summer day, their frequent communication suddenly ceased.

On June 17, 2005, Master Sgt. Robert Horrigan, 40, was killed while raiding a suspected enemy safe house in al-Qaim, Iraq. Master Sgt. Michael McNulty, 36, who was also killed in the fierce battle, also left behind a twin brother.

"I loved my brother so much that I wouldn't want him to experience the pain I'm going through," John said. "Losing him was probably the hardest thing I've ever done in my life."

John Horrigan, who makes knives while he's not fighting fires, is proud of his twin brother's three Bronze Star medals. But to this day, he admires Robert's mettle most.

"Robert was bigger than life," he said. "He is and will always be my hero."

COPYRIGHT 2014 CREATORS.COM

Tom Sileo is a nationally syndicated columnist and co-author of BROTHERS FOREVER: The Enduring Bond Between a Marine and a Navy SEAL that Transcended Their Ultimate Sacrifice. Written with Col. Tom Manion (Ret.) and published by Da Capo Press, BROTHERS FOREVER will be released in May. To find out more about Tom Sileo, or to read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators website.